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Slow Dancing in a Burning Room

I heard a song the other day, comparing a relationship between 2 people to slow dancing in a burning room. That paints a picture now doesn't it. You can just picture this couple, dancing in eachothers arms, holding eachother close. Yet the fire keeps burning closer and closer to them. You shout at them to get out.

At last minute they escape. Badly burned. And you wonder, what were they thinking? Did they not see the fire coming?

I look at the people around me, who are in these kind of relationships. And I wonder if they even know that it won't work out. They choose to wait til the very end, to call it quits. They choose to hurt eachother even greater than if they had decided to end it at the beginning when they knew it was the end. And you see, most of them can pinpoint when the end began.

Why when you know that you will eventually leave that person, do you drag it on and pretend that nothing is wrong. Is it perhaps that we are all afraid to be alone?

update ish

I don't know why I bother updating my jobs on here. It changes like the weather.
Ok recap, at the beginning of September I got a job at a spa, a chiropractors office, and as a support worker. I decided not to take the one as a support worked cuz i thought that when I started working at all 3 places it would be pretty crazy. Then my massage association took such a long time that the chiropractors office, their other massage therapist decided to take more hours on so that they didn't need me anymore.
So I have been working at just the spa...barely surviving. And going to a few job interviews that just didn't seem to fit. I actually turned some down cuz they didn't feel right.
well the other day I went to a job interview, and I wasn't sure how I felt about it. And they asked me to come back the next day to do a massage 'test' so to speak on one of the massage therapists. Well apparantly I passed the 'test' with flying colours and the massage therapist loved me and I was hired. Well I asked the boss chiropractor guy if I could try it out for a week to see how it felt. Well I will be starting Tuesday.
BUt now I am really confused. Because apparantly I may have to pay more money to get registered. Its really making me mad. I paid over 10,000$ to get certified. I paid 400$ to get associated, I paid $60 to get licensed, $30 for a criminal record check, and now apparantly I have to pay over 500$ to get registered.
So ya, I am not sure if I will be allowd to work at the chiro office until I get registered. But then once again I will get screwed over by the professional governing bodies. Yep, I am not bitter at all :)
anyways ya thats pretty much all thats new with me right now. I am just ya, tired I guess. Of not knowing what is next. I feel like I spend my life walking on eggshells. I am not sure what I mean by that but ya.
Things aren't bad right now, they are just hard.

a new breed

There is a new breed of people atleast in my province. The so called rich province. This breed is called the working homeless. I always hear people say that the homeless on the streets can always get jobs cuz there is a huge need for jobs out there right now. But how can you have no home and go to work each and every day? Who is going to put up with the smell. How is going ot put up with the lack of cleanliness. Where are you supposed to type up your resume? What if you don't have anything to put on your resume? And it is not just the already homeless that are affected.

It is normal everyday people. Someone close to me has become homeless. And I am truly worried about them. Land of the free we are called. But nothing at all comes free. No one can afford to live here. $900.oo for a 1 room appartment is not a good deal. Or you can move in to the skids, which I am not sure what is worse, that or living on the streets. Atleast when you live on the streets you have soup kitchens and toy drives that support you.

Where is the church in all of this. What about James 1:27....'Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."
Where are we? Instead we turn a batted eye and we wait for someone with a heart for this type of ministry to come along. It is not just a calling on a few people. THis is a command from God. If you call yourself a Christian you have no excuse for showing favoritism. Just read James and you should be smacked. If you aren't convicted by reading James...check your heart and see what is in it.

life as a teenage wannabe

When I was 17, things were good. They really were. That year had to be one of the best years of my life. It was so simple. I couldn't go into bars yet, so I didn't rely on those sorts of things to provide me with fun. All we did was drive. Drive, Drive, Drive. UP and down the streets, windows open, AM radio blarring...if it was my car. Even in the winter, the heat would be full blast and the windows would be open. Sometimes we would get out an walk. Get hit on my 'older 20 year old boys', but it was ok, we couldn't go into bars so nothing really stupid could happen.

Then things changed and I turned 18. Barred it up non stop. At least a few days a week. Thats what our fun was. We relied on the bars. And now, about a year ago I ran from that life. But I am back from the marathon run that I had found myself on for the past year. I find myself confused. Where did fun go. ? I don't find the same things fun anymore. I don't like to hang out with the same people. But I don't want to leave them either.

I find myself satisfied with doing nothing. Then I won't let myself down, and think that I am no fun anymore. I used to be the life of the party, infact I decided when the party started and when the party ended. Now I don't know how to have fun.

What do Christians do for fun?